Monday, November 2, 2009

A Do Over

So glad that’s over!  Anyone else feel that way about Halloween?  The influx of candy had been building all week, then big daughter got sick with the flu and my stress/emotional eating spell began.  Friday and Saturday were a blur of chocolate, sugar, cheese, bread, pizza and chips.  There was no semblance of health involved in any of the choices I made.  Actually, there were a few meals that I attempted to pull together something healthy, but ended up eating other things because eating something healthy didn’t even taste good.  I even ditched the exercise.  I have to say that I was scared for a minute.  I thought that I had gone completely off the deep end;  you know, that slippery slope that sends you back to old eating habits and 70 pounds heavier in no time flat.  *insert horror movie scream*.  Terrifying.

Saturday afternoon, I was doing some cleaning of clutter and came across a few pictures of myself.  There aren’t very many of me during the “fat years” which was a span of 10 years.  I was the one usually behind the camera.  I often joke to the husband that he could easily “off me” and there would be no evidence that I existed because most of the pictures of our family vacations and outings with the daughters are just of him and the girls!  I did happen to come across a few while cleaning out a bookcase and I was stunned to see the pictures of myself.  In the pictures, I had a smile on my face, but I knew that I hated the way that I looked…

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  I realize while looking at these, that there is no going back for me.  I cannot be that person again.  I won’t do it.  But, when I have gone this far off the deep end this weekend, it is so hard to get back on track.  How do I go back to trying to eat intuitively when I dropped it like a hot potato?  A fried one?  There was only one answer…

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Nike knows their stuff :)

That brings me to today.  I am stoked for a new month!  It’s gonna be a busy one and I’m going to think long and hard about how I will manage the eating season.  I know the issue is not the food, it’s how I react to the emotions and stress in my daily life.  I haven’t quite figured that part out yet, but I will keep on keepin’ on:)

First thing on the agenda was to fill up this guy…

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I’ve been really slacking on my water which is weird since I’ve always been a huge chugger.

Then, I tackled the first meal of the day –breakfast.  Nothing was appealing to me.  I still had sugar coursing through my veins!  I was going to skip it altogether, but know that usually comes back to haunt me!

I decided on a tasting breakfast plate…

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It got better from there!  Lunch was a bowl of black bean soup

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and a good hunk of cornbread

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The afternoon was long and filled with bowls of candy in every room!  I opted for some skim milk and a Ginger Apple Oat Breakfast Cookie

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Dinner was a family favorite – Chicken Cutlets and broccoli.  Instead of offering rustic Italian bread on the side, I decided to try out this Beer Bread mix from Trader Joe’s

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Just calls for a  bottle of this to make it…

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I haven’t had much luck with Beer Bread before.  The husband and daughters have not been fans, so I held my beer breath on this one!  It baked up beautifully in only 45 minutes and I didn’t detect much of a beer smell or taste at all.  Everyone loved it!  It was a nice, dense and slightly chewy bread.  I think it would make for a great grilled cheese, too. 

I served myself  a small slice with dinner…

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but dug into another slice before putting the remainder of the loaf away! 

JUST DO IT!!!

ONE GOOD THING:  I realized today that I can do this.  I can get back on track.  I can keep the weight off.  I can do it…for life :)

25 comments:

biz319 said...

I so needed this post Marissa! I too lost 70 pounds, but have gained 35 since being on insulin the past three years.

This weekend was a blur of food - pizza twice, then dinner out with my husband. The scale was not kind to me this morning!

It's back to basics for Biz! :D

Happy Monday!

A Daunting Tale of Scale Warfare said...

This weekend....agreed, so glad it's over. I dumped 10 pieces of candy in a kids pumpkin pale, it was the last 10 I had. I was scared I'd eat those (on top of the 8 I already had) too. Then I shut up shop. NO MORE CANDY. Kit Kats are evil.

YUMMO Beer bread is one of my favs. I didnt know that TJ's had a mix. I will have to pick it up on my next trip :)

Chari said...

Yay!
At least the day after Halloween is a NEW month right? I'm back on track today too! I just feel awful after all that candy! ick!!

Mrs.Ballou said...

I 2nd that! I am so glad it's over. I binged, I know so many who did! I've lost 44lbs so far and still have a ways to go...thank you for sharing this today! I needed it! :)

TjRenee said...

You're so right, Marisa. You can do this!!

I'll kick your ass if you don't, you know? ;)

Angie All The Way said...

You must have been such a worried Mom :-(

I am always surprised when I do the exact same thing and make bad choices and have food that I "think" is a bad ass thing that I shouldn't really have and I don't even like it! To me, it screams "rebellion" like I'm giving the finger to healthy living. But it no longer makes sense because we don't even like that crap anymore! lol

"Mareeeesa" (;-P), my dear, you got this and you're back on track and you're doin it, no doubt in the world!

Molls said...

Great post, Marissa! It was something I needed to read - thank you. You can do it!

TJ said...

I think when life gets tough, or you feel like you had a bad day (or weekend) looking back at old pictures is EXACTLY what we need to help us out. You can JUST DO IT! Good job for realizing you CAN! :)

fittingbackin said...

I overindulged this weekend. For sure. Time to get back on track and just do it. Thanks, girl - keep it up!!

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

It's funny to me how all of it seems to be intertwined somehow... the good eating, the good choices, the exercise. When one component falters, the whole house of cards can come down quickly.

To me, the key is just strengthening that foundation and make sure that the changes are ones that can be embraced for the long haul.

Carolina Girl said...

GREAT post. I really needed this today. Honestly you were gorgeous before, but looking at you now...wow! You are looking fierce girlfriend! Thanks for motivating me today. Back on the treadmill I go! :)

Joanna Sutter (Fitness & Spice) said...

Great stuff! Whenever I need a do over (like today for example!), I start with focusing on my water intake, too. Drinking more water has a magical way of making me feel like I'm doing something good for my body and everything else just falls into place from healthier eating to more intensity in the gym.

Joanna@BooneDocksWilcox said...

I read Marilu Henner's Eating Healthy book once and she was talking about the Yin and the Yang, when eating, try to stay off the ends of the seesaw, and stay balanced, was very interesting.

The Incredible Shrinking Family said...

That's the spirit ! Slip ups and bad days will happen- it is a part of life. We cannot undo the past , but we can do EVERYTHING about the future. Just do it, and don't look back ! And you have indeed made amazing progress ! I did not get sabotages by candy, but these evil cinnamon coated nuts found their way home and ...well it was bad. Today is a brand new day.

Tamara said...

Big congratulations for getting back on track. It is a slippery slope and it's damn slippery and it's damn steep too! but you halted it in its tracks and that is amazing. You're an inspiration whether you're eating right, running a 5k or blogging out the bad days. Hang in there Marissa. I think you're great!

And by the way: I made those breakfast cookies on the weekend. I love them! They are super filling and tasty. In fact, I've only been eating 1/2 at a time with PB and it's perfect. Thanks for the recipe!

Amanda said...

You are so right Marisa! I've lost 85 lbs and I had a huge binge the other day too! Must get back on track now! I never want to be my old self either! You look fantastic!

Andrea@WellnessNotes said...

Yes, you can do it and you are doing it! Great job!

I think the biggest challenge of maintenance is not over-reacting after some not so good eating and lack of exercise. It's finally letting go of the all or nothing attitude. And I think it's also realizing that we all go through this from time to time. That's why this blogging community is so amazing and so helpful I think.

purple_moonflower123 said...

Thanks Marissa! I have had days where a do over is necessary. My WW leader talks about dusting yourself off and getting back to it. Just because you get derailed, doesn't mean that you cannot get back on plan.

Melissa said...

I can relate. This weekend, I went out of control with the candy. I'm just glad it's over and have put it all behind me, sounds like you have to. Hopefully November will bring great things for both of us!

Oh and your dinner looks yummy! I'll have to try that bread.

Virginia said...

What a great post, very motivating! Thank you!

Jenn said...

Good for you, Marisa! You showed that someone can fall off the health wagon for a bit, but can get back on it...
One good day under your belt, I hope you feel like you're back on track!
Oh, and I had to make the candy go away - just can't have it around...

Alyson said...

That's the best part about exercising & eating well.. it's never too late, you can always get back on track! :)

Thinspired said...

Good for you! I love the "fresh start" feeling at the beginning of each month, and I agree that Nike is genius ;)
Fortunately (or unfortunately?) I didn't get ANY Halloweeen candy this year...it just wasn't around!
Happy Fresh Start November :)

Miz said...

you can you can you can.

and I love the very notion (for all of life. I so frequently say this to my daughter) that we are just as far from "back on track" as our next CHOICE.

Lori said...

You can do it. It takes planning and accountability. You've done so well. Sometimes we just need to roll around in the muck for awhile before getting back on track :D