Burnout

I think this is what I am experiencing: burnout. My funk from yesterday has not totally lifted. I started off with good intentions, but by lunchtime, I was off the wagon. I don't even know what I was eating; just anything. I didn't care what it was cause I just felt burned out from trying so hard. But some interesting revelations came to me today. I'll take you through the good parts of the day; no use talking about the rotten things I ate. It's already done. I'm gonna pay the price tomorrow (sorry A-Team), but I learned some things about myself. So here goes...

After hitting the elliptical for 35 min., I had a sausage and cheese english muffin using these guys...


A serving is 2 patties, 90 cal. and 6 gr. fat for 2 POINTS. I only used 1 patty which is 1 POINT. These guys are a bit small, so I had to cut it in half so it would cover my english muffin. For the sammie, I used a light english muffin, 1 sausage patty and a slice of 2% cheese (3 POINTS)...

I had good plans for lunch: black bean soup , a Golden Corn Vitatop and a tbsp. of hummus...

I split the Vitatop and spread the hummus on it. Mmmm. This was a good combo for 3 POINTS!

But, for some reason, that wasn't enough. Lots of other things came after this. But, I'm moving on...

So, I was out after lunch running some errands and I picked up something else to eat that I shouldn't have. It was an old habit that crept back and I have to say it felt scary. I sat in the car for a moment and "tried on" my old self again. I tried to imagine being the way I used to be and feeling the way I used to feel. It was a very strange and almost unfamiliar feeling. That felt encouraging. I realized that I don't know that person anymore. I am NOT that person anymore. I can't even imagine going back that way. I couldn't help singing that new song by T.I. (well, I don't know the rap part, just the chorus part that Justin Timberlake sings! - I'm not THAT cool) called Dead and Gone. The chorus goes, I've been travelin on this road too long, tryin to find my way back home, the old me's dead and gone, dead and gone...

And despite the return to some bad habits today, I do feel that the old me is dead and gone.

When I came home, I went down the basement and rifled through some bags of clothes that I still have down there. I dragged out a pair of jeans that I used to wear and I put them on. They were gigantic. Falling off, huge. I stared at them in disbelief. I could remember when these size 20's were tight. Here's some pics...

I really needed to see that. I decided I am going to keep these jeans as a reminder of how far I have come. Even when I don't feel it or the scale might not show it or I am just plain sick of it all, I will try on these jeans of the old me that's dead and gone. Not for mourning, only for celebrating who I am now and what the new me has been able to accomplish.

From then on, it was back on track. I feel like I need to make some changes in my eating or perhaps my exercise. I'm going to think about it the rest of the week and come up with some goals for myself. Small changes and do-able goals. I don't want to go screwing with too many things at once!

I had to help out at church tonight, so when I came home, I just heated up some leftovers for myself. I made pizza potatoes using 3 oz. leftover baked potato wedges, 1/4 c. sauce and 1 oz. lite mozzarella. I heated it all in the micro and had a side of carrots all for 5 POINTS...

I think I'll skip dessert tonight for obvious reasons! I still have to Shred , too! Only 17 days left!!! Oh and the husband, who is pretty physically fit, decided to try out the Level 2 Shred this morning for his workout. He came down all sweaty and said, boy that was hard! He said his legs felt shaky, he thinks he may be sore tomorrow! Oooooh reeeeeeally!!! So there, Level 2 Shred is not for wimps, fur shur =)

Hope everyone had a great day! I'm ready to be my WW lovin self tomorrow, so thanks for putting up with me!

The Pursuit Of Saltiness

I craved the saltiest food today! This TOM is really a pain; literally. I felt like a blob this morning and too tired/achy to do my exercise. I knew I would need to find a way to do it later because I need to burn some of the calories from yesterday's sabotage snacking! I may have sabotaged myself this week, but I AIN'T quittin'!!!! There is a show of progress; my former self would have quit trying to eat healthy after binging like that. I would have felt defeated. But, I have come too far now, so no quitting. Onward!

For breakfast, I wanted to try one of these new (to me) Vitatops...



I love corn muffins, so I was excited to try these. I can't say they really taste like a corn muffin. I think they are more on the "wheaty" side, but still taste good, especially for 1 POINT! With my Golden Corn Vitatop, I made an egg white omelette with a handful of baby spinach. I let loose with the salt shaker ,too! It was more like a salt omelette with egg white!!! eeewww - but, it tasted really good to me today...


I finally dragged myself out of the house to do some grocery shopping. I was starving when I got home and I fixed a quick lunch while putting the food away. I looked for the saltiest things I could find. I went with a bowl of Tabatchnik Vegetable Soup, a Dietz and Watson Gourmet Lite Beef Hot Dog on a light bun with mustard and dill relish and a serving of crunchy, super salty pretzel sticks!!! Salt, salt and more salt!! I am probably going to weigh 14 lbs. more tomorrow with all this salt!!!! But, boy did it taste goooood! All for 5 POINTS...

I felt like something sweet afterward, so I had a Weight Watchers Peanut Butter Cookie for 1 POINT...

I tried to have something with a little more protein for snack to get me to dinner without an oversnacking incident. I went with a hard-boiled egg white (with salt!!), light string cheese and half an orange...

The husband and daughters had an early dinner tonight, due to big daughters basketball practice. While they were eating some leftovers, I put on my sneakers and headed to the basement for a treadmill run/walk. My Dad gave me a Polar heart rate monitor that he is no longer using and I have been excited to try it! I put it on (it's a chest strap and a wrist watch) and watched my heart go! I decided to run and walk to get more of a high intensity interval-type workout. It was good, but quick. I clocked out in about 30 minutes because I had to tend to little daughter, but I'm glad I fit it in.

I made myself a heat and eat dinner of this...

I know, more salt! I try not to eat frozen dinners because of this, but I had this in the freezer and thought I should use it up. Glad I did; it was awesome! I don't usually say that of Lean Cuisine dinners, but this one is a keeper. It is parmesan crusted fish with penne pasta, veggies and a tomato sauce. The fish was delicious and moist with a crispy coating and the pasta was al dente and had a nice flavor. I would definitely buy this again! I paired it with a salad dressed with Kraft Light Three Cheese Ranch. A yummy 7 Point meal...

I bought a boat load of berries at the store today, so I made a Berry Sundae for dessert. I used a serving of sugar-free, fat-free cheesecake pudding topped with 5 oz. sliced strawberries, 1/2 c. blueberries and a dollop of fat-free Cool Whip. YUMMMMMM!

I'm glad I was able to regroup today. Part of that was just eating whatever I was craving (hence, all the salty stuff) instead of eating what I thought would be a better or more well-rounded choice. There's always tomorrow for that.....

=)